Do you ever feel completely invisible? Do your rights take a back seat to everyone else's needs? Are you expected to be seen and not heard? Are your feelings disregarded, or worse yet, dismissed as insane, hysterical, hateful? Are you labeled a crank, a karen, a nutcase? Anybody ever been really rude to you and then some helpful soul points out that the real problem is, you just need to smile more?
Well then, you just might be a woman after all!
All in good humor here, with no bitterness intended (yet another sign of being a woman) but that's how I know you're not really a female. Women actually don't try to claim female dominance over the ladies bathroom. In fact, we often go in pairs! Needing a bathroom buddy to hold our hand is a somewhat amusing and common characteristic of many girls, with some darker realities behind it, some unpleasant biological truths hardwired right into us.
I don't care how many kick ass girl hero movies we make with a female Rambo in stilettos, our lack of safety and vulnerability is still hardwired into the very DNA of any woman born woman. If your risk-o-meter was somehow broken, or your discernment failed you, life experiences have probably given you a good trauma meter to fall back on by now.
That is why you are not a woman.
Do you hear me trying to take care of the feelings of those who might be reading my words? Do you hear my hesitation to not offend anyone? My concern that I not be perceived as complaining in a way that might make someone else uncomfortable? Again, all very female like behaviors, female like thinking patterns, female concerns. Of course we're all a bit different, and we're all bold in different ways, I'm just saying, THIS is why you are not a female!
A female does not fight to gain dominance over a perceived territory, like a restroom. At best she just wants to get in there and get out of there as safely as possible. And it's not all about men, either! Too much exposure to the toxicity of women can leave you with a lifelong eating disorder and a propensity to cut yourself.
A female is not really trying to be seen and perceived or to have her gender acknowledged and accepted by everyone else. In fact, often the precise opposite! It can be confusing because sexual mores come into play, so we want to be attractive, to be looking good, to be noticed, but on the other hand, we often need our gender to be forgotten, we need to be cloaked in a hoodie, wrapped in the safety of non descript, androgyny.
THIS, this is why I know you are not a woman.
Being a woman is not about drag queen shows, wigs and ball gowns, it is not about being big, bold, and beautiful, loud and proud. Those are all very masculine traits. That is male dominance, male peacockery on full display. Did you know it is the males who are the peacocks shaking their giant tail feathers? True story. Women are simply not loud and proud like that, not even the loud ones.
That's how I know you're not a female.
Women are also not likely to try to dominate sports and claim their territory, in quite the same competitive way that men do. When you see women trying to break into men's sports, its because they had no other opportunity, no other options. Women don't try to compete in men's sports to be number one, they invade men's spaces to have an opportunity to just play. Being number one isn't even really on the radar. There is no trying to be top dog in some kind of dominance hierarchy.
How do I know you're a mediocre male with a need to be top dog in your own imaginary dominance hierarchy? You invade and take over women's sports to assuage and mollify your own masculinity.
That is how I know you are not a woman.
And lastly, I know you are not a woman because you are not punished in quite the same way I am. My glorious proclamation of all things feminine is likely to get kicked off of twitter and censored on wordpress and facebook. I was born this way, I have little choice in the matter, but of course, the "born this way" rule suddenly doesn't apply to me and my kind. I sometimes joke, "men have never met a double standard they didn't like." Your attempt to stake claim to all of womanhood will probably just get you a political appointment and several government contracts. People will call you "so brave," they will rally around your perceived victimhood, and nurture you like a lost little boy who must be forever defended and protected.
I just become the problem, the hater, the bigot, the crank who just won't get educated, get with the program, accept the new narrative. Ironically, being women a good chunk of us already have, we've surrendered, we've submitted, we've even rallied to protect and defend the lost little boys of the gender confusion wars, like the mothers we innately are. Hey, it's cool, just take my gold medal, own the bathroom, borrow my dresses, and chest feed your babies.
That's how I know you are not female.
And even now my heart just aches for what we've done, for what we've allowed to happen, for how we've let our schools crank out children whose goal in life now is to just raise enough money to remove their genitals. Think about how insane that is, how tragic! I just wail in despair, they are so brainwashed, so young, and my anger about the complete disregard they show for the safety and well being of women born women, many who have already been traumatized, is tempered by my tears for the adult created, purposefully groomed young casualties of this culture war.
You haven't got these scars. You don't carry this kind of pain and you never will, no matter how many pills you take or how much surgery you have. Your pain will be your own, but it still won't be the pain of a woman.
