Monday, July 27, 2015

No, just no



How The Manosphere Is Filling A Void Left By Feminized Modern Churches

Don’t read the above article, I’m compelled to link simply out of common courtesy. I cannot really give a proper wail over the stupidity of it all if I do not at least reference what I am talking about.

No, just no, the manosphere does not “fill a void left behind by the feminized church”, or perhaps it does in the same way that drugs, alcohol, money and unlimited sex might fill a void, a God sized hole in people’s spirits that can only be satisfied with a God sized relationship.

Why does the manosphere not serve as a good substitute? Well, there is the unbelievable hatred and bitterness expressed by many, the unrelenting hostility towards women, the bad theology, the cult like behavior, the attempts to replace inconvenient Christian values with ideology and clever catch phrases like hypergamy and AWALT, there is the pride, the arrogance, the evolutionary psych theories, the bad psychology, the relentless talk of sexual conquest….

By their fruits you shall know them, that is why! Your fruits are flat out rotten, people. You drive more people away from Christianity then your animal baptizing rainbow flag flying believers do.

All in good humor here, but anybody ever hear And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone….. It is so not good! Like, hello people! Maybe God did not design an exclusively male world run something like the Lord of the Flies?

I do not mean to be so critical, to paint everyone with the same brush, there are a few good manopsherians that actually take their theology very seriously, that actually do recognize what Christ taught, but oh there are others, others who use scripture to promote false things, to justify assorted sins, to promote male dominance in all things, to present women as only partially human and it doesn’t stop there, there are so called Christian manospherians that double down on the racial hatred as well. You have Vox Day actually calling himself the voice of God and his dread ilk with their so called Social Justice Campaign, and Dalrock who deletes all dissent, while promoting this idea that all women are spawns of satan.

It is not church people. It is so not Christ either. It is validation and justification for every feminist ideal ever dreamed up, no matter how harebrained and foolish.

The ostracizing, the bullying, the doxing, the harassment, the threats, I know, I know, it is the internet, we cannot control what everyone does and says, but those are the fruits of such foolishness and I have seen them. These are real things, ugly things. Just stop it already.

Oh, I could carry on and on bemoaning the perversion of such beautiful theology, the mangling of the very image of Christ himself, the never ending bits of stupidity being presented as so called “sound religious reasoning” in the hearts of such bitter and wounded men.

The author of this bit of nonsense says, I haven’t been to church in 20 years. But I vicariously live through other Christian bloggers…

Yeah, so called Christian bloggers who tell you to stay away from church because it’s been feminized. Bloggers who continuously promote hatred in Christ’s name, bloggers who wouldn’t know the bible if it bit them on the behind.

I really don’t know why I care, why I cannot let it go, why my whole spirit is consumed with despair and fury when I see this sort of thing going on, but it is true. I am driven to speak out against this over and over again.

Honestly, I don’t think the enemy himself could have written a better line than this,
“….because whether you realize it or not, ROK, Tom Leykis, Dalrock, and the hundreds of others sites that have evolved over the past 10 years to reconstitute the wisdom that was lost since the 1960’s, are a perfect, dare I say, superior substitute.  We are the new “church.”

A superior substitute? Oh dear Lord. It is Christ’s church people, there are no substitutes! It has always been Christ’s church and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it.

Then he says, “Of course, we are not preaching salvation…”

You don’t say?? Of course not. Christ without salvation, why am I not surprised? We’re going to provide you with everything you might find in faith, in church, in religion, except the ENTIRE HEART OF THE MESSAGE!

Ai yi yi, let me whack my head on my desk a few times.

Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Christian Heritage News & Commentary: Christians Standing Against Feminism

Christian Heritage News & Commentary: Christians Standing Against Feminism: By Anna Grace Wood - Posted at The Cross Is All We Need: Titus 2: 2-5, “The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh ...

Friday, July 17, 2015

The Lost Art of Being a Lady



First let me confess here, I definitely grew up on the wrong side of the tracks and in some dark places, and never concerned myself too much with decorum. Survival yes, decorum not so much.

Okay, so there was one incident where I may even have chewed tobacco on a dare. It was the most hideous thing ever, but it sure did wipe the smirk off of someone’s face and earn me 20 bucks. The dare was simply that girls couldn’t chew tobacco. I settled that, oh yes we can. Why in the heck we would ever want to is another question entirely, but we can.

We can do a lot of things we probably shouldn’t. Just because we can, doesn’t always mean we should. In fact, doing things just because you can is often a bad idea.

So, I really must declare myself to be a self-professed expert on how to be both a lady and not a lady. Also, I simply have to lament the complete decline of western civilization and rant about the sad state of affairs we now find ourselves in. In our quest to promote the idea that girls can do anything, including completely rejecting anything that girls can do, we have really created a monster. Gone is anything that may be considered soft or feminine or heaven forbid, “pink.” Being a lady is apparently something only “old people” do, or so I have been told. Young girls tend to sneer at the very idea.

Yes, yes I know, “don’t judge me,” but I must because it is bad, very bad, out there in The Big World. Girls seem to have forgotten that being a lady is about who and what you are, how you define your own self, what you draw and attract towards yourself. It is really not about being oppressed at all, but rather about being fully empowered.

This was a fairly simple matter to teach my older children some 30 years ago, but the culture has just declined so rapidly that now such efforts fall on deaf ears, leaving me in complete despair over the state of young womanhood.  Oh, woe is me…I play to a rough crowd, indeed.

How rough, you may ask? Oh boy, so rough that we now think nothing of standing on a street corner having a spitting contest, competing to see who can hock up the most disgusting weaponry possible, while taunting passer-bys. It is enough to make me want to snap a few thongs that are so prominently displayed about six inches outside of our clothing.

Girls apparently do not understand older women and the danger that lurks there, the mental instability that can strike at any moment and send one out on a thong snapping tirade. I kid you not, do not be deceived by the meek and mild appearance, the gentle mannerisms that young girls so foolishly try to dismiss as “weakness” in older women. You delude yourselves indeed, having no idea what lurks beneath that soft veneer….. but I digress.

Alas, today femininity seems to be all about being as loud as possible, cursing vehemently, being outrageous and shocking, reveling in the sheer perversion of it all, and presenting the world with a hard and tough exterior as if to say, “don’t even mess with me.” I empathize deeply with those “don’t tread on me” sentiments, however it is far more powerful to hold them on the inside, to keep them incognito, so when you do strike, nobody sees it coming. To advertise how big and bad you actually perceive yourself to be, is simply foolishness. “Keep them guessing and they’ll never see you coming” is a far better approach and sure to gain you a much-needed advantage.

All those pocket knives and spikes and torn and shredded tights, simply scream “bring it on, I dare you!” But please just ask yourselves, what in the world are you demanding people “bring on” and why??

What The World really needs from you is what it has always needed from you, your soft heart, your gentleness, your capacity to empathize with others and to create beauty where none exists. To reflect and multiply the goodness that is within, to shine your light into the world, to transform what is ugly and unappealing and to create something beautiful. That is what women have done for centuries, the gifts we have brought to the world, a rare and fine resource indeed, one that has known its own worth and value so well, it has never felt the need to try to prove itself.

We may well love men or at least find boys to be curious and enchanting creatures indeed, but that does not mean we must suddenly start imitating the very worst of their behavior! This is not a competition, a race to the bottom, you are unique and special and different. It is that very difference that makes you special! Embrace it, accentuate it, celebrate it. Be proud of who and what you are and the job you have been given to do.

Do not envy boys and men for what they can do, because just like you, what they can do is not always what they should do. There is truly nothing particularly clever or desirable about chewing tobacco or spitting great wads of horror out on a public street. Such things take no special talent, nor are they the trappings of the affluent and so-called privileged. Like, hello, to seek what you perceive men to “have” is to fail to know the nature of your own self or the nature of men, and the saddest thing of all is you must erase all that is good and golden about your own self in the process.

Your softness, your sweet and gentle spirit, is what The World has always needed from you and it is what the world still needs from you. It is not an easy job, it is not a job for the faint of heart, it is by far the most challenging thing you will ever do, but for goodness sakes do it! When we do not step into those shoes, when we fail to rise to the occasion, The World gets thrown out of balance, the ugly things remain ugly, your light does not shine, and the hidden beauty does not get seen.

The World seeks to deceive you, The World has always sought to deceive women, to convince us to snuf out our own light, to deny our own femininity, to exchange it for all kinds of cheap imitations, ranging from a piece of fruit to some bizarre notion of sexual empowerfulness. It is a war, a war I tell you, one we did not chose but one we must fight with everything we’ve got. Failure is not an option.

Ask yourself why such a relentless war exists, why such an enemy persists all through time, and then you will come to know your true worth and value, your vital purpose in the world. That is what you must fight for, that is the enemy you must rebel against, and nothing irks him more then a girl with a sweet and gentle spirit, bound and determined to make some ugly things more beautiful.

Quite simply what “ladies” do is walk in the world with a keen awareness of their own worth and value, no easy task I assure you. It is not bold and arrogant, nor is it  narcissistic and entitled, but rather quietly filled with confidence and grace.

bb

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

"Our Sister's Keeper"

So, Tomassi of Irrational Male fame has written a post called, Our Sister’s Keeper.  Yikes. Ai yi yi, where to start, with hip waders and goggles I suppose, and a big shovel so we can cut through all the rhetoric, ideology, and hostility, and try to get to the heart of the matter.

Men are their sister’s keeper. We are our brother’s keeper. Whether in the context of faith or simply in the context of biology, it is what it is, total and complete symbiosis between the two genders. We can all attempt to squirm our way out of that truth, but truth it remains. No man is an island and women, well we give birth to men, and the hand that rocks the cradle in many ways, does rule the world.

Tomassi goes on to say, (of Beta game) “Play nice, respect a woman by default, be supportive of her self-image and ambitions to the sacrifice of your own, don’t judge her and do your utmost to identify with the feminine, was the call to action that, deductively, should make a man more attractive to a woman.”

Oh, the sheer horror! Play nice, respect women, be supportive, sacrifice, what a bunch of chumps men are, huh? The next thing you know women will actually demand men get girl cooties on them or something and when that happens you know she has truly harvested your organs and feasted on your very soul.

In the narcissistic, solipsistic soul of the wounded male ego, it never even occurs to them that women are actually also making sacrifices in the equation. Let me tell you, nothing makes you feel like a “beta chump” faster than finding yourself abandoned after the prime of your youth has faded, left behind with a pack of kids to feed because some wanker has decided he needs to go find himself. Naturally the first place he goes seeking himself….. is in another woman.

In fact if you want to get technical about it, hypergamy is actually the male sexual strategy projected onto women, an attempt to both reject the nature of yourselves and to blame women for it, an attempt to excuse and to justify your own dual sexual strategy. Men want security, families, respect, but they do want to sow their wild oats, too. Have modern women learned how to imitate this male biological strategy? Oh yes! Oh yes, and it is the oddest thing to witness, both tragic and funny at the same time. This is why you have college girls hooking up and the morning after saying “Wait, why am I having casual sex with dudes I don’t even like for reasons I can’t even fathom?? Did I even consent to this? Why, there outta be a law! A consent law! I couldn’t possibly have agreed to this kind of stupid, it’s just all wrong.”

It is just “all wrong” and girls are often aware of this on some level, but when you have grown up in a culture where women’s value is  presented as an exclusively sexual one, where you have been taught your empowerfulness as a female revolves entirely around your sexuality, it is very confusing. Combine this with normal hormones and the male sexual strategy which usually involves trying to storm the castle gates, or climbing over them or under them, or convincing you to open the drawbridge in some way, and you have questionable female agency. It’s a bit like demanding a woman stand tall in the face of a battalion of armed men coming over the hill. She is expected to not only know the nature of her own self, but to know the nature of men too, to understand the cultural deceptions going on in our world, and to stand there unarmed, deflecting all those arrows flying in her direction.

You know what the average age a woman is when she is expected to show this kind of emotional maturity and deep understanding of the nature of the world around her? 13 years old. It’s rather astounding, but while boys are still splashing around in mud puddles and sneaking off to look at dirty pictures in  Nat’l Geographic, 13-year-old girls are trying to navigate the world of so-called sexual agency. They have already encountered those words “slut” and “prude”, “bitch” and “whore.” They have to just learn to pick their poison too, because I assure you which ever persona they chose, it will be the wrong one.

Alas, women are not Batman either, and what you often wind up with is a dead soldier, a bit of collateral damage, full of sexual confusion, trying to make sense of what’s left of the the world around her.

“I’ve always found it fascinating because for all my dealing in cold harsh observable facts I’ve never paused to consider that women might have some excusable reason for their ethically challenged behavior..”

With all due respect, that usually is the position men take when they cannot face the truth of their own “ethically challenged behavior.” Do you know that I have spent years researching men’s ethically challenged behavior? Why? Empathy. A desire to understand why some insist on destroying themselves. To understand the nature of male/female relationships. To try and grasp the nature of the world around me. Can you even imagine trying to do that without ever bothering to understand and empathize with the other gender’s “ethical challenges?” Half the human race?? That’s so narcissistic it’s enough to make me laugh.

He continues, “In my own estimate Hypergamy isn’t inherently bad or good – it just depends on whether you find yourself on the sharp end of it….”

Complete moral relativism, rather astounding actually. See, I don’t believe hypergamy rules women at all, but suppose I did? In that case, what kind of a sociopath would simply say, “whatever, just as long as I don’t end upon the sharp end of your stick, it’s all good?”

“The problem I see in assigning the blame of women’s behavior to men’s lack of control is that, presently, men have no real control nor does men’s concept of justice align with that of women…”

Ah, and now we get to the heart of the matter, the blame and shame game. Men whether they want it or not, have a very protective nature towards women. Their sense of self-worth really is motivated by a desire for respect from women, respect that often comes from having a sense of honor. What really knocks men off base? Shame. Men have a fascinating and profound relationship with shame. You can hear it hinted at in Tomassi’s words, we have no control, it’s not fair, we can’t possibly be to blame… You can hear it all those derogatory remarks about women frequently found in Tomassi’s comment section, those attempts to make her smaller, more devious, more evil than you perceive yourselves to be. That is how we dehumanize an enemy, how we detach in order to try to justify our own behavior towards them. That is what men do when they are feeling weak and powerless, burdened with all of the responsibility and yet none of the authority or control. Full of shame about what is going on in the world but completely unable to do anything about it.

“On a final note here, whenever I delve into the ethical implications of Red Pill awareness I invariably run into the personal responsibility equation. I do my best to make as coldly rational an observation of dynamics I see and allow my readers to make their own judgements. However, those observation are never intended to excuse the behaviors men and women find themselves prone to acting out.”

Well, that’s something at least. Some kind of awareness that perhaps some people may subjectively receive your words and take them as permission, as justification and validation for what I sometimes refer to as wankerhood, no gender designation intended. All in good humor here, but oh, speak to me of the sins of Adam, about how his words just flow like milk and honey, not my fault Lord, not my fault, see this woman you gave me…..

Speak to me of men and their perceived ability to be rational, the great pride they take in allegedly being so coldly clinical, so detached from human emotion, that the first man actually took it upon himself to try to explain the nature of sin to God Himself. Quite sweetly even, so rationally, so logically….and so totally full of coconut candy that he found himself tossed out into the wilderness, too.

Anything, anything at all to try to avoid that awful shame, that sense of responsibility, that deep seated fear that just knows within itself, to whom much is given, much is expected…

Tomassi concludes with,“So are men to blame for the conditions they find their women in? Are we our sisters’ keepers, hamstrung by our own culpability to actually help them be better women? Or do they bear the responsibility to conform to our perspective of justice and police the worst impulses of a Hypergamy most are only peripherally aware of?”

Again, that blame/shame dichotomy I write so much about. What an evident and powerful example of that desire to claim no agency, no responsibility, and yet to reap the rewards, the fruits of having done so. That really is the human condition, something both men and women always struggle with, we tend to want all of the authority, all of the power, all of the control, and yet none of the blame. The buck stops here, what a quaint and outdated idea.

Ironically, the “hypergamy” women are expected to police is not really our own, but actually men’s! Men off running wild with it about the ‘sphere and saying, “meh, not my problem, I ain’t my sister’s keeper.”

Tomassi asks the wrong question because he is trapped in that pride/shame dichotomy, the one devoid of love, the fear based response that first demands to know, just who’s fault this all going to be? Who is to blame?

Like it or not you cannot have it both ways, that is a deception. If you wish to claim your own genuine power and authority, to step fully into those shoes, then you will embrace your own responsibility. The question should not be whether or not women have any personal agency, but whether or not you do. If you chose no, then you will forever be “hamstrung by your own culpability.”

Another name for “hamstrung by your own culpability,” is trapped in your own shame. It needn’t be that way. There is a much  better way of being in the world. Now, I may well have a very romantic and idealistic expectation of men, but that is neither a delusion nor a fantasy, it is based on truth and the example set by so many men who rise to the challenge, who actually perceive themselves precisely as I do.

I am my brother’s keeper, rather shamelessly not “hamstrung by my own culpability.” That is what it means to walk fully in faith and love.

Wednesday, July 8, 2015

Toxic Masculinity?


"Understanding Toxic Masculinity: Why Defending Men Isn’t Enough"

Interesting article written last year that I rather enjoyed.

“Vast forums host scores of lonely and deranged life drop-outs regularly assembling to rail against The Matriarchy and obsess about sex.”

Yes, yes, we’ve certainly met. Call it a close encounter of the unpleasant kind. The woman who wrote this article refers to them as biter men, I call them the Lost Boys.

I now have a pretty clear understanding of what toxic masculinity is and what it is not. It’s kind of sad, we’re living in a culture that has worked really hard to change gender roles, to redefine the family, to restructure the definition of marriage, and many boys and men are now suffering, completely confused about who and what they are, what their roles are, how they fit into the equation. What it even means to be men anymore.

She says, “This is the essence of “toxic masculinity.” It is emotionally stunted and obsessed with sex and violence. Toxic males seek the thrill of danger and shun responsibility and commitment. Since they lust after women but don’t want to marry or love them, their attitude towards the other sex tends to be offensively objectifying, and can easily turn misogynistic if (as often happens) they experience rejection.”

This is especially sad to me, because misogyny nearly always has it’s roots in self-loathing. It is not really fear of women, it is not really hatred of women, it is deep seated resentment and inability to embrace and love the very nature of your own self. It is generally wrapped in layers and layers of shame and deception.

It’s somewhat amusing, the most common complaint I get is that I don’t empathize with men. It’s amusing because I’ve written dozens of posts paying tribute to fathers, brothers, husbands, marriage, love. I am a wife, a mother, a sister, a daughter, my entire life is entwined and shaped and formed by relationships with men. Symbiosis. I really cannot pour anymore praise over men than I already do. So, such false accusations are simply foolishness and people’s erratic attempts to confirm their own biases.

She goes on to say, “My experience suggests conservatives are more or less united in seeing healthy masculinity as a positive thing, which we as a society should encourage and foster. That being the case, it should be possible to discuss potentially-toxic strains of masculine culture among ourselves without risk of becoming more generally anti-male.”

Amen. This country really does need to have a discussion on what healthy masculinity is and what it is not. Like many other discussions we need to have as a culture, it is an issue so wrapped in hyperbole and knee jerk emotionalism it is unlikely to ever happen.

If He Truly Loved Us....

A common theme spoken by non believers is that they simply cannot allow themselves to believe in a God of love, if that same God would allow us to condemn ourselves to eternal torment. Yes, I said, “condemn ourselves,” because really we have free will here and can avail ourselves of all the love and salvation that is being offered to us at any time. He doesn’t really condemn us, we condemn our own selves.

The whole idea reminds me a bit of someone who is drowning and there is a lifeboat and we refuse to get in it because “if you truly loved me, you’d pick me up and put me in it, whether I had the good sense to climb aboard or not.”

“If you truly loved me…..” probably a love test women are more likely to be familiar with than men, because sometimes we do like to test those waters.

So how could God possibly standby and watch us condemn ourselves to eternal torment? I don’t know, but sometimes I wonder how naive one must be to not recognize that this is precisely what many of us are called to do, although on a much smaller scale. Ever watch a loved one waste away with drugs and alcohol, completely powerless to do anything about it?

Ever cared for a diabetic who refuses to manage their diabetes, knowing full well exactly what awaits them? Sores that won’t heal, infection, eventual amputations, blindness, organ failure. Or we could probably avoid all that and just change your diet a bit, exercise, regulate your blood sugar. Forgetaboutit, often people prefer to just do things their own way, the hard way. I don’t know why, but I’m not any different.

It’s a bit amusing in its tragedy, but I can’t tell you how many people I have tried to educate, tried to explain that if you are lucky to live long enough, you will begin to slowly decompose from the inside out, doomed to lose toes, a leg, both legs, until eventually you will die. The answer is nearly always, “Shut up lady, and just hand me my snickers bar.” And yet still I persist, love compels me to, to beg, to plead, to flatter, to cajole, to pray, to use every skill I have to offer to win them over, often to no avail.

It’s sad, life is full of enough things that are genuinely out of our hands, things we simply cannot control. It makes no sense to me that we would then bring additional misery down upon ourselves by being so stubborn and yet we do, all the time. Even I do.

If He really loved me…… He would show up in person and prove His existence so I could be free of doubt.

If He really loved me……..He would know who and what I am and take my choices away so I don’t hurt myself.

If He really loved me…….He would end all the suffering in the world so I don’t have feel bad about it.

If He really loved me………He would not expect me to be accountable for my own choices.

It’s somewhat fascinating, authentic love actually requires all four of those things. There must be some doubt, some freewill, some suffering, some accountability. Without those four things, there is not authentic love, but rather a cheap imitation.  Without doubt there can be no gratitude, but only a sense of entitlement. Without free will, it’s not love but rather Stockholm syndrome. Without suffering there will be no empathy. Without accountability and personal responsibility, love becomes nothing more than narcissism, selfishness. We often tend to want love on our own terms by our own definition, but God’s love really is perfect, far more perfect than we often understand.

He created us, placed us in paradise, laid beauty at our feet, breathed life into us. Even when we betrayed Him, he gently clothed us in skins and set us forth to make our way in the world. When we again betrayed Him, he still did not annihilate us all, but made arrangements to salvage what was left of us. Then He came down here, walked in our shoes, empathized with us, experienced what we experience, faced temptation, grieved over what He saw. Then He was betrayed again and He willingly died for us, suffering on our behalf, so we would not have to pay the price, not have to suffer the consequences of our own actions. He died for us. What greater love is there??

And yet some still insist on trying to say, well, if He really loved us…….

The question is all wrong. The question should be, what kind of a moron would reject such clearly proven love and why?? Don’t be offended, compared to God, we’re all morons. If He really loved us……If one cannot see how much He truly does, the error is on our end. Always.


humility